Q. Not long ago, my mother, who is in her 80s, was the victim of financial exploitation by an in-home health aide. It started with trips to the grocery store and small loans. Before long, the caregiver was regularly taking my mother and her credit card to the mall to purchase clothes and other items […]
8 Things You Can Do to Prevent Elder Abuse
Dear Commander Bun Bun, I heard that elder abuse can include physical, financial, emotional, or psychological abuse, or abandonment and neglect, and am alarmed at how common it is. What are some ways to prevent elder abuse in my family and in the community? Best, Anita Stoppitt —- Dear Anita, Every year an estimated 5 million older Americans are victims of elder […]
Appliances That Speak to Each Other, and Other Incredible Aging-in-Place Technology
Robear Robot When Carol’s mother, Eleanor, had a stroke a few years back, she and her husband moved in with her. Eleanor was not very steady on her feet, and surfed the furniture to get around. Carol and her husband were always worried about her falling, especially in the bathroom. They became reluctant to leave her alone so, like Eleanor, they too became housebound. Carol and her […]
Ask the Expert: VA to Offer One-Stop Website for Veteran’s Benefits
Q. My father, Joe, is a Vietnam veteran. He gets frustrated and confused when he tries to navigate all the veteran’s benefits websites and figure out what he may be eligible for. Even the VA Website doesn’t have everything he needs, and he has had bad experiences calling them, sitting on hold, getting transferred to […]
Are There Monetary Benefits for Veterans with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)?
Dear Commander Bun Bun, I write to you because I too was a Commander (in the U.S. Navy). I suffer from PTSD, and often have severe nightmares and flashbacks. I have been going to therapy for years, and even tried biofeedback, but it is becoming quite costly. Do you know of any benefits available to […]
PBS Releases “Caring for Mom and Dad” Documentary
Graphic from pbs.org. Chris Olson was recently diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, and her husband, Brent, has prostate cancer. They lived alone, 300 miles away from their nearest daughter, and needed assistance. Their daughter, Breanna, who was beginning a promising political career, and her sister Shanna, a working mother of two, decided to put their careers on […]
Protecting My Mother from Scams
Dear Angel, I recently visited my 80-year old mother, who is in the early stages of dementia. I noticed boxes of items that were mailed to her, including tons of magazines about body building and deep sea fishing (both of which don’t interest her), and a pile of sweepstakes she entered. I would like to […]
Informal Home Care Could Result in Medicaid Ineligibility
Betty Jensen was an elderly woman with dementia, who resided in her home in Muskegon, Michigan. In May 2011, when she needed assistance, her concerned grandson, Jason, acted on her behalf and hired a non-relative, Teresa Alexander, to serve as her Caregiver. Hiring a Caregiver When hiring the Caregiver, Jason entered into an informal agreement […]
Seniors Should Consider Cruise Ships Rather than Nursing Homes
About 2 years ago my wife and I were on a cruise through the western Mediterranean aboard a Princess liner. At dinner we noticed a senior lady sitting alone along the rail of the grand stairway in the main dining room. I also noticed that all the staff, ships officers, waiters, busboys, etc., all seemed […]
Technology to Help Seniors Age-in-Place Safely
Dear Commander Bun Bun, My mother, Shirley, is in her 80’s and living alone. Recently, she reluctantly agreed to wear a device that allows her to call for help if she fell. It gives my brother and me a sense of security to know she has it, but I was told by friends and other […]
Non-Borrowing Spouses Can Still Face Eviction Due to Previous Reverse Mortgage Rules
Amy (59) and her husband, Frank (66), decided to get a reverse mortgage, sometimes known as an HECM (Home Equity Conversion Mortgage), last summer to supplement Fred’s Social Security. Amy was left off the reverse mortgage, due to her age. Later, she and her husband read about how a change has been made to the rules […]
Estate Planning for Childless Couples
When many people think of estate planning, they assume that a person’s heirs are his or her children. But what happens when a couple has no children? Do they need to plan too? The answer is yes. At the very least, they should answer two questions: who will inherit their property, and who should handle […]
Ask the Expert: Can You Deduct a Toupee from Taxes?
Q. My boyfriend, Richard, became self-conscious about his baldness last year and went out one day and purchased a toupee. We also took in a foster cat, landscaped our property, and installed an in-ground pool to help us stay fit. I know these things sound random, but I read online that you can deduct some […]
Want Free Long-Term Care? Try Medicare Part G.
Q. Nursing homes are so exorbitantly expensive. There is no way I can afford long-term care for myself, when the time comes, or for my husband, Morty. Is there any way to qualify for free long-term care in this country? A friend told me there’s a Medicare Part G that pays for free long-term care, […]
Before You Sign a Continuing Care Contract
Continuing Care Retirement Communities (CCRC), also known as Life Care Communities, offer older adults a spectrum of services and care facilities, typically starting with independent living arrangements, then advancing to assisted living, and then progressing ultimately to nursing home care. In CRCCs, the shelter and services are offered under a contract that lasts for a […]
Hospice Care For Mom? But, She Isn’t Dying.
Q. My mother, Roxanne, 76, has suffered from lung disease for ten years. She still has her wits about her, and spends her days knitting, reading historical novels, and sipping tea. Recently, her doctor recommended hospice care, and I was perplexed by his recommendation. She has been living fine for a decade with her lung […]
Beating the Winter Blues
Dear Saki and Alley, I get depressed at this time of year, ever since my husband passed away. I had a full house for the holidays and everything seemed great, but now that it is over and the tree and decorations are gone, I am sad. I have physical and financial limitations that keep me […]
How Nursing Homes are Collecting Debts- More Reason to Plan Ahead
Lillian Palermo, a 90-year old retired insurance executive, entered a nursing home after she began experiencing dementia, falls, and surgical complications. Her husband, Dino, who is eight years her junior, visits her every day. He sings her favorite songs, feeds her home-cooked Italian food, and pays a private aide to be there when he cannot. […]
Would You Want This In Your Advance Medical Directive?
Jerome Medalie can’t imagine life with Alzheimer’s. And, he has made it known that he doesn’t want to be around if he can’t “recognize his loved ones” or “articulate coherent thoughts and sentences.” He did so formally and legally in his Advance Medical Directive. According to a recent New York Times blog post, if Jerome […]
Ask the Expert: Forgetfulness: When to Call a Doctor
Q. My mother, Meg, has not been herself lately. Last week, when going to the neighborhood post office, she got completely disoriented and lost. She asks the same questions over and over again and often repeats stories. She even forgot the ingredients for dad’s favorite soup last week, which she has been cooking for 40 […]
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